My dog was such a nerd that I had to get happy and healthy to keep him

Embrace every change that comes to your life. You don’t always know what you truly need.

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“Dachshund resting on white hanged fabric” by Erda Estremera on Unsplash

have loved dogs since I can remember myself. My parents wouldn’t let me have one, so my favorite game as a child was to make wild cats mine and take care of them. I would have more than 30 cats during my childhood, some of them had names, others didn’t. All of them made my childhood a lovely place to be and a human that walks with everyone on this planet. My neighbors taught me to fight for their rights too.

Anyway, my deepest desire was to have a dog. The first years I lived as a student I wasn’t able to adopt one because I studied and I worked at the same time. Some years later, without having it in my mind, I was “seeing” a blond dog walking next to me everywhere and I was like “Oh I am here now throwing my garbage, why not have a dog and do it together”, “Oh what a lovely forest, why not have a cute puppy running all over the place” and so many other romantic thoughts. Until one day, I made the decision to get in touch with the local shelter and adopt a furry tail.

“Hello! I would love to come to your shelter and adopt a dog. I would like it to be about 15–20 kilos, female and old, extremely old”

I forgot to tell you I had my first signs of depression (shhh her name was laziness this period) and I wanted a dog with little energy to live peacefully and loved the little of the life that has remained. (A person-puppy that would have just arrived on Earth, super excited about that, would not match a lot to me, I guess)

So here I was, waiting for a reply that had never arrived.

I was out with a friend one night and told her I decided to adopt a doggy! She was so happy for me, she had a dog for 17 years and she found the idea super exciting.

“I sent a message to the local shelter and they didn’t reply, I don’t want to get a dog that is easy to find a home. I need an old female and abandoned dog. A dog that no one wants”.

And then her phone rings. It is her niece telling her that she had a surprise for her. It was a puppy and she would come to give it to her, now.

“Now” was the worst date for me. A puppy? Now?Tonight? Oh my god, I have regretted it, I can’t have a puppy right now, tonight I mean I am not prepared. 10 minutes later a blond puppy about 2 months old, male was in my arms while I was saying I am sorry I can’t keep it, this puppy will get big, he is a boy and you know he is a person that is really excited to have just arrived on Earth. “I will keep it only for tonight”, I said knowing that there was a lie in my words.

Two days later I said to myself “The way this dog came here, is very unique”, “Maybe I need to face life as it comes, so I made the brave decision to name him Danny and keep him in my life and my tiny apartment.

Do you remember me telling you about my depression? Yeah, she was with us too. We were three in a tiny apartment, but Danny was the only one of us who was extremely happy to be on Earth. So, this guy won.

As I said, my apartment was small, so I decided that I had to take him for long walks, because first of all, I wanted the dog to live a happy life and not feel guilty that he lives in a small place. You can feel how difficult it was for me to get out of my bed every morning at 7:00 and then have a walk of about 2 hours in the night. Some of the times I was crying, to be honest about the morning thing. It was too late though, Danny was here to stay because I couldn’t let him go after some months we were together. I had already loved him.

As he was growing he got a little weird though. He used to beat my head with his when I got closer, he used to destroy everything I left on the floor. He made me feel furious and more responsible with my things. Every time I was getting back from work and faced the mess I was crying silently because it was too late for him to understand what he had done. And you know what? It was only last year when I realized how much beneficial was that for me. For the past years, I was extremely silent and my reactions were pathetic about everything. I would never cry or protest about anything. Danny gave feelings back to my heart and face and I couldn’t see it at that time.

Danny was a little nerd too. He didn’t like some of my bad habits, such as smoking and long sleep. He would never get in the house if it wasn’t well refreshed, he used to cry and wanted more walk, until everything was properly prepared for him. He always cried when something was not the way he wanted and he was right. (so bad habits were gone before even realizing it). At the end of the year, we met a great new friend with Roxy and made a great company together. We met every night at 9:00 and walked from the city to the beach for 3 hours. 3 hours everyday walking, no matter the weather or my negative feeling before meeting them. I was depressed every night before going out and slept extremely happy later at night. I started philosophizing with my new friend and the dogs would run all around. Each night of this great winter was different and special, we watched animals, the Moon, the stars, we spoke about ideas.

This is the reason I changed my friends this year too. I became more selective about how I spent my time and 6 years later I am a totally different person. Yes, I would make some changes in my life, but what kind of changes would they be? No one knows.

I took life as it went and didn’t adopt the dog I wanted, but I opened my heart to the dog that came to me. I changed my body and mind so as to match with this dog and I improved myself. If I had taken the dog I thought I needed, the most possible would be that we would browse on the internet 8 hours a day with her and take her for a short walk around the block because no one would push me for more. That would not change my life.

After Danny’s first birthday, I decided to become the person he thought I was. So I decided to get in the local shelter as a volunteer and respond to every message I get. Danny and I managed to give over 300 puppies and older dogs for about 2 years. That is our story and this is what made me feel pride about myself in a really bad period of my life. It gave me the self-esteem I needed to carry on in and bring such great results in my life, this time for myself.

We now live in a house with a garden and Danny is about 40 kilos.

I don’t know many things in life, but what I truly know is, embrace every change that comes to your life. You don’t always know what you truly need.

Now I can adopt the old lady I was dreaming about. Now I can tell for sure, I know how to take life as it comes, mastering my fear and loving every minute of it, even if my clothes are wet and dirty of long walks in rainy nights, just 6 hours before work.

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I love writers, writers are good people. They speak in your mind with your voice. I will be writing every week until I become a voice in your beautiful head.

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